The Happening (2008) - ★

Director: M. Night Shyamalan
Writer: M. Night Shyamalan
Stars: Mark Wahlberg, Zooey Deschanel, John Leguizamo, Betty Buckley

Wow. This movie is bad. It's really, really, really bad. Every actor deserves a Razzie for Worst Performance. M. Night Shyamalan deserves the Razzie for Worst Screenplay and Picture. This is one of the worst movies ever made. Even though I laughed at this movie, it wasn't 'so bad it's good.' It's just terrible.

The story: everyone is killing themselves! Who? What? Why? You'll find out what's causing the horrible phenomenon eventually... and when you do, be prepared to laugh. It seems like an interesting idea at first, but The Happening proved that this story just doesn't work. We follow Elliot (Wahlberg), his girlfriend Alma (Zooey Deschanel) and several other characters we don't care about as they traverse through the US countryside trying to find refuge from the strange toxin that is messing with everyone's brains.

Right off the bat, this sounds like a movie by the infamous 'worst director of all time' Ed Wood. The fact that it was written and directed by the accomplished director of The Sixth Sense rubs salt into the wound. I don't know what's been going on in Shyamalan's head as of late, but his movies have stunk recently (particularly The Last Airbender). 

The most unforgivable part of the movie would have to be that the characters are just plain unlikable. They have no depth to their personality except for the fact that they like to insult each other, A LOT. In this time of crisis, the acting on everyone's part came across amateurish and unnatural. Who acts like a snotty teenager while everyone in the country is killing themselves? Apparently Alma and Julian (Leguizamo) do.

Shyamalan's movies all tend to be overly serious. This one takes the biggest cake of all. With such a ridiculous story, the amount of urgency he pumps into it just makes it all the more laughable. If that's not enough, it has some of the worst dialogue in movie history. The speeches are like this, "We're not gonna be one of those assholes on the news who watches a crime happen and not do something! We're not assholes!"

I think I've painted you a pretty good picture of just how bad this movie is. To be honest, I don't even think the story had potential. Every aspect of this movie was terrible in one way or another. The only redeeming quality I guess is that it's original. If you feel like watching a bad movie for laughs, this may fit the criteria. I highly suggest you pass on this one though.